Memories
Memories You Will Want To See
Every photograph is a moment that was real. A moment that happened. A moment that cannot be taken away.
My darling son Keanu. I do not know how old you are when you find this. I do not know what you have been told about me, or what name you use for yourself now, or what you have been told about why I am not there.
What I know is this, Keanu. You are my son, my blood, my DNA. You are my only son and I love you more than I could ever explain. I think about you every single minute of every single day. I have lost count of how many times I have cried myself to sleep because I am not able to have you with me. I watch videos of us together almost every day. I have a photo of you and your sister Kiera on the wallpaper of my phone. It feels like my heart is bleeding constantly.
Keanu, all I ever wanted was to be the best daddy I could to you. When we were together we used to have so much fun. Playing football, playing with your cars, playing with your bath toys, playing with your kitchen, pretending to cook, watching your cartoons together. Reading you a story before bed until you fell asleep in my arms was the best feeling ever, and I miss this so much. So much I cannot explain. All these joys have been taken away from me, but I promise you I will never stop fighting to be reunited with you. I really pray that one day I get the chance to explain everything to you, and you get to hear my side of the story.
I am not going to talk badly about your mother or ask you to take sides. I just want you to understand that you will have been told things about me, and my side of the story will be very different. What I do want you to know is this: none of what happened was your fault. None of it. Not a single part of it.
By the way, you have a sister. My daughter. Her name is Kiera Rosa Savage and she is 14 years old right now, and she loves you with everything she has. She talks about you. She asks about you. She has a brother-shaped space in her life that nobody else can fill. You are not alone in this world. You have never been alone.
You also have grandparents in England. Your granddad, Pops, whose full name is Peter John Savage, and you carry his name as part of your own, Keanu Peter Yusuf Savage. And your grandmother, Ama. They are elderly. They think about you every day. You are their only grandson and you are so precious to them in a way that words cannot hold. Please reach out to them while you still can.
I built this website so you could see photos of us together and so many happy memories. Please look at the videos on the YouTube channel. You will see so many moments and hopefully you can feel how loved you are. Nobody could take this from you. No distance, no silence, no amount of time. These letters will be here waiting. These photographs will be here. The truth about who you are and where you come from will be here whenever you are ready for it.
And my love, if you find this site and I am no longer in this world, if God has taken me before I could hold you again, please please reach out to your sister Kiera Rosa Savage. Please find her on Instagram, Facebook, wherever you can. It would mean the world to me if you two could be close and you could hear her story. She is your blood. She is your family. She will love you the moment she sees you.
Every photograph is a moment that was real. A moment that happened. A moment that cannot be taken away.
Your dad made videos for you. Messages he wanted you to hear. Memories he never wanted you to lose. All of it waiting here, just for you.
Kiera Rosa Savage is 14 years old and she is your big sister. She thinks about you. She has a brother-shaped space in her life that no one else can fill. These are some of the moments she treasures most.
In England, two people think about you every single day. You are their only grandson and you are everything to them.
Keanu, Daddy and Pops at The Mulia Hotel, Bali. Three generations. Pops flew all the way from England to be with you. Look at that smile of his.
Ama reading to you at Christmas in Bali. You sat on her lap and listened to every word. She held you like she never wanted to let go.
Ama and Keanu together, reading again. In your Paw Patrol pyjamas, tucked in beside her. She read to you every chance she got.
Pops and Keanu building Lego together at Christmas. Completely absorbed, both of you. Pops was right there with you, every step of the way.
"This was never about anything other than love. There was no reason good enough to keep a father from his son. Keanu, you deserved better than this. One day you will know the full truth."